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Lately I’ve been battling with immediate obedience. Something I thought I’d conquered before.

There are a few things I believe God’s calling me to and because of fear and doubt, I’ve been slow to respond. And guess what my queens and the kings that are possibly reading, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but slow obedience is still disobedience.

Let’s take it back.

When God told me to tell my story in Four Years Hostage, I sat on it for a few weeks. Maybe a month. Why?

I did not want others to see or know about my scars. I didn’t want people to know “my business” or judge me. But God read me. QUICK. I was reminded that I am His business. Thats a mouthful within itself, but we’ll revisit. *sips tea*

No, I won’t speak on the details (they can be found in that reading), but I will say when God speaks, listen. You may not understand but trust and know that God wants best for you. I look at how many lives my story’s touched and still touching, and I know that God is an intentional God and NOTHING is ever wasted.

God’s going to use every tear, mistake and consequence. You may think it’s too late, it’s not. Romans 8:28 reminds us, “And we know that ALL things work together for good to to those who love God, to those who are the called according to HIs purpose” (NKJV) You may feel you’ve come too far to return. Or maybe you feel you’ve invested too much to just let go, nah sis. If God’s told you to walk away or leave. Do it. If He’s told you to be still, sit at his feet. If God’s told you to use your voice, use it! If God’s told you to serve in this season, do just that. Whatever it may be, seek Him and do it. He will not lead you astray.

Many times we get so caught up questioning God wanting to know the why for his instructions, but that’s where stepping off that boat comes into play.

Obedience may not feel good or look the way we expect, especially when we have “our plans”. Most of us think when choosing obedience, there’s always an immediate result. No. You may not see the purpose or promise immediately. Heck, you may not see it at all. It may come in later generations. This life, the things you encounter, is not just for you . As my mentor would always tell me, you never know who or what is on the other side of your obedience.

Me telling my story, I didn’t know what I was getting into. I just knew God said to share. I never would have thought by me facing fear and being obedient would heal others. Even those who hadn’t experienced, it still spoke to them.

I didn’t know that I’d even stir up as different fight down on the inside of me. I didn’t think it’d be useful. I figured I should just hide. But God.

So, my question to you is what are you going to do? Are you going to be obedient and walk in your God-given purpose or no?

Remember, there’s a price to stepping out of alignment, and there’s a reward for being obedient.

Which will you choose?

I love you. And remember, grace yourself sis!

p.s. this is grace

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